FBC – 436 – How to stop putting yourself down

How to stop putting yourself down.

Hello Freedom enthousiasts,

I just recorded this brand new episode and you should definitely listen to it

Listen to it here 👇

Listen To It On Your Favorite Platform: 

              

Are you trying to model after someone that you follow and you feel that there must be something wrong with you?

Why is it that they make it and, despite your best efforts, you can't seem to pull it off.

This kind of situation can be very frustrating and hurtful for many people

I recently helped a friend, who had been suffering from that same problem for many years, snap out of it.

There is one crucial concept you have to understand that will liberate you from this burden that you might be carrying today

All the details in today's episode

—

Here is one of my favorite quotes:

“Ideas are easy. Implementation is hard.”
, Guy Kawasaki, co-founder Alltop

[Full Disclosure: As an affiliate, I receive compensation if you purchase through my affiliate link.]

Martin Ebongue

Online Entrepreneur & free spirit:

Proud Owner Of The 50K Emails A Day Done-For-You Software

Table of Contents

Toggle

Here are some recommended resources:

🚀 Start A Money-Making Business: The #1 Beginner Friendly System That Allows You To Earn Upwards Of $7,954.55/mo On Autopilot (All Done-For-You)

 👉 List Building Secrets: 10,000+ targeted emails per day, WITHOUT paying for ads and WITHOUT building a single funnel or landing page

 💰 Make $3,000/mo In Passive Income On Fiverr : How To Automate Fiverr & Turn It Into Your Own Personal Passive Income Generating Machine (Ideal For Beginners with NO SKILLS)

 💡 Make Money Online For Beginners: From $67k In Debt To Running An Automated 6-Figure Passive Income Empire

 🔥 Passive Income At Its Best: How To Make $50,000 From Unsubscribers Without Lifting A Finger (FREE MONEY)

 ====

 P.S: Want To Earn Passive Income & Travel Full-Time Using Automated Bots That Do EVERYTHING For You?

 The SHOCKING part is that THEY DO ALL THE SELLING FOR YOU (FOR LIFE)!👇

✅ Make Money From Home With Automated Bots

 

 

 

 

 

🔥Subscribe to my Podcast🔥

Listen To It On Your Favorite Platform:

                

 

Your Podcast Host

International Speaker | Podcaster | Free Spirit

Freedom Is A Choice: So choose wisely...

Welcome to the Freedom By Choice Podcast with your one and only hoste Martin. This podcast is reserved for freedom aficionados and entrepreneurs looking to create the lifestyle of their dreams.

In this podcast you will find all the support and answers you need to start, grow and scale a business that gives you the freedom you deserve.

I have compressed years of trials and errors, into easy to consume episodes, to take you from where you are now, to where you want to be.

I wanted to answer a few questions that I got from people, and I got these questions also from a very good friend of mine who is transitioning, actually, trying to figure out what the next move is and kind of like what to do. And he was asking me my opinion on the on the subject.

The thing is that, you know, sometimes you have a lack of role model that you're following. So let's say, for example, you're following this person and you like everything about them, right? You do. You like the way they see things and how their business operates and all that kind of stuff. And you want to be kind of like this person, you know? So it’s very easy to end up in this situation.

But one thing that I want you guys to understand, remember that I told you that in the previous podcast, you need to select your mentors carefully because you will inherit their beliefs and chain of thoughts and convictions and all that kind of stuff.

You know, if you're not careful, if you don't take the information for what it is and then afterwards make it your own, you can end up in a situation like this. But one thing that I didn't tell you before was that there is another thing that could actually happen to you and that could trigger a whole lot of the stress and confusion and frustration.

So when someone is your role model, there are different things that you like about them. Right? So there's the business that they have and what they do. But also the person, OK, because it is possible to find someone who is very successful, they have a good business but you don't like them because you just don't like the way they are.

But there is one thing that's actually very, very dangerous. And this is what I was trying to explain in previous episodes, I explained the difference between creators and performers.

When you start following someone and idolizing that person, you want to be like that person, forgetting to take into account the fact that maybe you are not a creator. So let's say, for example, you you're a big fan of, I don't know, Bill Gates or something like that.

But you in your core, you're more of a performer. And you will go through a very, very long frustration period where you'll basically tell yourself that you suck.

Why can’t I do this? Bill Gates did it and why can't I? It's just because you're not cut from the same cloth. You're more of a performer and not necessarily a creator, which again, there's nothing bad about being a performer and nothing bad about being a creator. It's just two different things. They're equally as valuable to the success of a company.

And if you don't recognize this, then you will feel bad. So my other friend, she was feeling really, really bad about this because, there was someone that she admires. She wants to model after that person. But she was like, dude, I don't know why I can't. I try and, you know, what's wrong with me?

How to stop putting yourself down

And I was like, look, here's the thing. Here's the distinction. You do have the same values as that person so you can replicate those and you can, like, emulate that. But you have forgotten about this this whole other aspect where maybe that person's a creator and you're not or maybe that person is a performer and you're not a performer.

She was miserable because of this, you know, asking herself what's wrong with me and stuff, there's nothing wrong with you.

OK, so if there is some people like this that you admire, some people in your family, you see them do this and you're like, oh, why can't I?. Then the point here is to recognize, just look at your whole life. If you look at your whole life, you'll be able to know if you're a performer, if you're a creator.

You are judging your inside against their outside

You follow someone you admire, try to copy what they do, fall short, and decide the problem must be you.

It almost never is. When you model someone and it does not click, you are comparing your full internal reality, the doubt, the false starts, the boring grind, against the tiny slice of their life they chose to show you. Of course you feel like something is wrong with you. You are matching your whole self against their highlight.

I wasted a lot of energy putting myself down for exactly this. What fixed it was realizing the person I admired had their own pile of failures I would never see. Once I stopped treating their surface as the truth, the pressure to be perfect on the first try disappeared.

Copy the principles, not the polish. Take the method and expect it to look ugly while you learn it. That ugliness is not a flaw in you. It is the normal shape of getting good.

This is well documented. Harvard Business Review has covered how the comparison of self to curated success fuels impostor feelings, and Stripe Atlas keeps showing that the founders you admire failed plenty on the way up.

I talk through building real self trust on the podcast and in my story. Stop putting yourself down for losing a race you cannot even see.

Frequently Asked Questions

Why do solopreneurs put themselves down even when they are succeeding?

Self-talk patterns formed in childhood often outlast adult achievement. Solopreneurs are also high-agency people who notice every gap between current and ideal. Without rewriting the inner script, success creates more self-criticism, not less. The fix is conscious daily reframing, not waiting for an external milestone to silence it.

What is a practical way to reduce negative self-talk?

Keep a daily wins log. Write three small wins per evening: a published post, a closed call, a finished task. After 30 days you have 90 documented wins and a dataset that contradicts the negative voice. Solopreneurs who maintain this practice for a quarter report measurable confidence gains.

How does self-talk impact business performance directly?

Negative self-talk lowers asking prices, slows shipping, and triggers procrastination. It is one of the highest cost bugs in a solo operation because it compounds invisibly. A 10 percent improvement in inner dialogue can produce a 30 percent revenue lift over six months by removing self-imposed friction on every decision.

Should solopreneurs invest in coaching or therapy for self-talk?

Yes, when the pattern is persistent. A few sessions with a coach or therapist can rewire decades of inner script in weeks. The return on this investment is high because the same brain has to make every business decision for years. Cleaner self-talk produces cleaner strategy and better risk taking.

Related Reading

• Polaris Experience LLC Review
• FBC , 445 , The best setup to protect your lifestyle and success
• What AI Tools Can Help Entrepreneurs Identify The Right Influencers For Their Ni
• Tresorit Review