FBC – 498 – Want business success and happiness? Then you must avoid THIS at all cost

Want business success and happiness? Then you must avoid THIS at all cost.

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Do you want to be successful in business and live a fulfilling life?

Then you need to hear this. Today, I am going to tell you about a fatal mistake that leads many people down the path of misery and failure.

Picking this road is a one-way ticket to bitter-land.

I will also tell you what you should be doing instead to guarantee your happiness and success (whatever success means to you)

Make sure not to miss this episode

,

Here is one of my favorite quotes:

“Either you run the day, or the day runs you.”
-Jim Rohn

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Martin Ebongue

Online Entrepreneur & free spirit:

Proud Co-Founder Of The Ninja leads Mastermind

 

Here are some recommended resources:

Money-Making Hacks For Beginners: How Yo Make $250 In ONLY 30 Minutes As Complete Beginner

How To Build Income Streams: Check Out The System That Allowed Me To Build 27 Income Streams

Passive Income: Best System For Beginners To Earn Passive Income Without A List, Social Media Or Ads.

 

 

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International Speaker | Podcaster | Free Spirit

Freedom Is A Choice: So choose wisely…

Welcome to the Freedom By Choice Podcast with your one and only hoste Martin. This podcast is reserved for freedom aficionados and entrepreneurs looking to create the lifestyle of their dreams.

In this podcast you will find all the support and answers you need to start, grow and scale a business that gives you the freedom you deserve.

I have compressed years of trials and errors, into easy to consume episodes, to take you from where you are now, to where you want to be.

I saw it in the video somewhere. So it was something about the movement, Black Lives Matter, where people were quoting some statistics about wealth between, you know, like white. Students, for example, and then black students, right, so they did this survey and they were looking at people's net worth.

And they realized that, let's say, for example, the net worth in university was slightly higher for a white student than a black student, on average.

But what was very surprising was that even after they graduated and they had their first job, in a lot of cases, the black student, the former student, had a lower net worth or disposable income than when they were a student, OK, which was kind of puzzling.

So what they were explaining was that in a lot of cases it was because it was probably the first person to actually make it that far in the family, graduating from university. And then because of that, they basically, instead of building a whole career in their own life, they had to support a lot of people in the family because they were the top dog now.

So instead of being able to invest in stuff, then it was helping a lot of people. Which brings me to my point. The network that you have around you, like the people you have around you is actually quite important too.

A white student had pretty much everybody in their family who went to university and all that kind of stuff. Parents were well-established. And again, this is the average. It doesn't apply to everybody.

But basically because of that, they could have better connections, whereas the other students, the blacks were the first person to actually make it that far.

OK, so that shows you that the network that you have is very important in the success that you are going to have or at least the opportunities that are going to come your way.

OK, this is not an excuse to say, oh, well, you know what? I didn't have the connections and this is why blah, blah, blah, this is just people making excuses.

But it was very revealing of how important the connections and stuff like that your network is in the opportunities that you will get through introductions.

Want business success and happiness? Then you must avoid THIS at all cost

But there are different definitions of success. Everybody has their own definition of success. There is not one definition. Some people will tell you, man, success in life is, you know, having kids. And to some people, success in life is oh, I want a company where I have two million people. You have different motivations and you need to pick your motivation.

But today, I wanted to talk to you about one particular motivation that a lot of people have. The motivation that I'm talking about is about people who have a chip on their shoulder. These are people who have something to prove to someone else or to everybody.

Maybe you didn't have something when you were growing up or, you know, something was unfair or the people preferred some other person because they had this. You didn't have that. Well, usually it comes from there.

But here's the problem with this. The problem with this is that your motivation is external, right? You have an external locus of control. OK, so basically it doesn't come from within. You're basing your happiness on what other people will think. OK.

And the problem is that you will always, always find someone who is unhappy about what you're doing, someone who doubts you, someone who thinks you're a phony, you're a scam or something. You will always find someone like that. So what does that tell you?

It tells you that this never ends. If you have stuff to prove to people, it will never end.

You wanted to start the business, nobody believed in you. Well, you want prove them wrong. And then you started making money. And then what you want to do when you make that money, then you want to rub it in their face.

OK, so what you do is you start buying expensive cars and, you know, I don't know, flashing your lifestyle, social media, blah, blah, blah, to show people that, look, I made it, you bastards, you didn't believe in me, OK?

So that means you always find someone you have something to prove to. And the other problem is you might find some people you want to prove something to you who have more money than you. You will always, always find something bigger, something better, something newer.

OK, and please understand the chain reaction that comes just from this one thing, this one motivation of having to prove something to someone. It comes from one decision that you made and it will follow you and have disastrous consequences.

So if there is one thing that you need to remember, it's not how much money you make it’s how much money you keep. So this is why if you are building a business or something, anything you do, you need to focus on the profits.

Key Takeaways

Comparison is the silent killer of solopreneur success. It steals focus, time, and momentum.

You will never beat someone else's highlight reel with your behind the scenes reality. Stop trying.

The only honest benchmark is who you were yesterday. Compete with that version of yourself.

Frequently Asked Questions

What should you avoid at all cost for business success and happiness?

Comparison. Constantly measuring your progress against other entrepreneurs destroys focus, creates fake urgency, and makes you abandon strategies before they have time to work.

Why is comparison so damaging for solopreneurs?

Because you compare your behind the scenes reality to someone else's highlight reel. You never see their failures, debts, or sleepless nights, only their best moments.

How do you stop comparing yourself to other entrepreneurs?

Mute or unfollow accounts that trigger comparison, focus on your own metrics, and run your business against your own benchmarks instead of someone else's success.

Is competition the same as comparison?

No. Competition pushes you to improve based on a clear standard. Comparison just makes you feel inadequate without giving you a path forward.

Can you be ambitious without comparing yourself to others?

Yes. Use your past self as the benchmark. Compete with who you were last month, last quarter, or last year. That is the only honest comparison.

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If You Have To Choose Between Success And Happiness, You Built The Wrong Business

I used to believe I had to sacrifice my happiness now to earn success later. So I ground myself down, hit some goals, and felt empty anyway. That was the lesson that changed everything. A business that costs you your peace is not success, it is a well paid prison. Real success is a business that gives you money and your life back at the same time, not one that trades one for the other forever.

So design for both from the start. Build something that fits the life you actually want, automate the parts that drain you, and stop treating misery as the price of ambition. I talk about building a business that funds a life you love on the Freedom by Choice podcast and in my Diary of a Virtual CEO newsletter. For the research, Harvard Business Review has written on how meaning and wellbeing drive performance, and Entrepreneur has covered founders who chose sustainable over relentless.