FBC – 170 – This is one of your dreams worst enemies

This is one of your dreams worst enemies.

The biggest enemy of your dreams is the reflex to give up when something does not work the first time. In this episode of the Freedom By Choice podcast, I share a real experience of debugging a project for hours and how the instinct to quit is hardwired into us, but overcoming it is what separates people who achieve their goals from those who do not.

Today we are going to talk about one of the biggest dream killers out there. For some reasons, we all fall prey of this ruthless enemy that's engraved in our bones.

More details about what this enemy is inside this podcast.

I wanted to talk to you about something I'm going through right now and the lessons that you can get out of there. So the reflexes, you know, there are some reflexes that you're conditioned to have and you need to fight them. OK. So basically, I am working on a project right now for a fundraiser.

So the fundraiser to help get more donations and everything for the for the kids in order to be able to finance a project that we have that will allow the kids to stay with their families on their respective islands, instead of coming all the way to Bali and actually not seeing their family except once every like three years or something.

So we want to be able to provide them with an education right where they are so that they don't have to move. OK. So we're working on this project there and we're ready to launch something. We've been preparing now for a while. And last minute, I realized that something wasn't working. OK.

And yeah, I was trying to figure out what it was. And it took me for ever. So it's a piece of code that actually generates different variations on stuff. And there is absolutely no reason why it shouldn't work. Right. I tested everything. I tried for like hours and hours and I really couldn't figure out what it was. And so at that point, I thought, you know what? Let me fix this before you actually launch everything and stuff. I need to rewrite the whole thing and blah, blah, blah.

This is one of your dreams worst enemies

All right. So this is a reflex that we're conditioned to have like, well, dude, let’s wait until I fix that. And then afterwards we can launch. And that is something that you need to do as an entrepreneur. You need to learn how to do this. And this is something I have been learning myself.

You need to launch as soon as possible! OK. So it doesn't have to be perfect. Perfect is the enemy of action. Okay. If you're waiting until everything is perfect, you're going to wait until you die. It's never, ever going to be perfect.

I had the choice between spending god knows how much time trying to fix this or basically trying to launch it because I have another version that actually works. You need to fight your urge of trying to get everything perfect. So what did I decide to do? I was like, dude, let's use the generic one.

And then that leaves me time to go and test the other one in the background, the stuff. And then afterwards you can always make it better and stuff, but you want your stuff out there.

Key Insight: Your brain is wired to conserve energy, which means your first instinct when something gets hard is to quit. Recognizing this reflex for what it is (a survival mechanism, not a logical assessment) is the first step to overcoming it.

Key Insight: Most people give up on their dreams not because the dream was impossible, but because they hit one obstacle and interpreted it as a sign to stop. The people who succeed are the ones who treat obstacles as data, not as dead ends.

Okay. So we all want to have something perfect coming out of the gate. Right. So I'm not saying start working with something that will embarrass you and that sucks. No. Put out something that's good enough. It's not perfect yet but it's good enough and you're not embarrassed of it. And just work with this because, you know, here is the thing. You will make more impact by being out there than not being out there.

Look at your current situation. Right. Even if you have a say, a semi decent product, that semi-decent product is better than no product. Don't wait until it's perfect and all that stuff. Just get it out there and then you'll be able to correct it afterwards. It's better to be out there than not!!

About the Author

Martin Ebongue is the founder of martinebongue.com, an online business and lifestyle design blog focused on helping aspiring entrepreneurs build location-independent businesses. Since 2014, he has been creating and scaling online ventures across multiple niches, from digital products and affiliate marketing to SaaS and content platforms, while traveling the world. He shares the real-world strategies, tools, and systems that work, with a particular focus on AI-powered automation for solopreneurs. Follow him on YouTube, X (Twitter), and Instagram.

Related Reading

• FBC – 4 Part 1 – This is the story of my life: Success, Failure and The Hurdles.
• FBC – 3 – Escape your life of sacrifice! Don’t settle for less than your dream lifestyle.
• FBC – 8 – The Weirdest Challenge To Boost Your Confidence
• Other really cool tips that will give you an unfair advantage

Frequently Asked Questions

What is the biggest dream killer for entrepreneurs?

The biggest dream killer is the reflex to give up when things get difficult. This instinct is hardwired into our biology as an energy conservation mechanism. Recognizing it as a reflex rather than a rational decision is the first step to pushing through.

How do I stop giving up on things too soon?

Set a “minimum effort” rule for yourself. Before abandoning any project, commit to trying at least three different approaches to solve the problem. Most breakthroughs happen just beyond the point where most people quit.

Is persistence always the right answer, or should I sometimes quit?

Persistence is the right answer when the goal still matters to you and you have not exhausted all possible approaches. Quitting makes sense when the goal itself no longer aligns with what you want. The key is distinguishing between quitting because it is hard and quitting because it is wrong.

Further reading

• my Substack archive: essays on the invisible forces that pull operators away from the work that actually matters.
• Freedom by Choice podcast: conversations with founders on the relationships and routines that quietly drain ambition.
• Harvard Business Review on focus and ambition: studies on what corrodes long term focus and how to spot it inside your own week.
• Stripe Atlas on the founder long game: the routines that keep founders aligned with their original goal once the business starts paying.