FBC – 19 – The Dark Side Of The Dream Life..

Everybody wants the dream life…However, there are things you certainly don't know about the dark side of the dream life you are so eager to create. I wasn't really prepared for it because nobody warned me and it hit me hard.

So today I want to talk about something that nobody talks about. There is one person who talked about it and that's when I came to that realization and it's a very interesting concept that you need to prepare yourself for.

And again nobody will tell you anything about it, so I figured I will be the one to tell you that. So I want to talk about the downside or the flip side of the dream life. Sounds interesting right? What if there is a flip side? Actually there is!

So let me let me explain this because it's something that you don't actually expect and if no one tells you about it, you might not realize it. And that was the case for me. So we are all trying to build our dream life. OK. So you know you start your business and you have this lifestyle business that your life revolves around. Your business revolves around that dream life.

So you set up everything and you actually reach that goal and you have what's called the dream life. Everybody hates you, everybody's jealous. OK. And this is what happened to me actually. So I designed the life that I wanted. A life that's specific to me. So you know nobody's like me on this planet right. And nobody's like you on this planet.

You might have people with some similarities but nobody is exactly like you. So that life that you want to build is tailored for you and nobody else. So the life I created is tailored for me.

It's the perfect life for me. OK. And while that perfect life you know what happens? I don’t have to deal with people or do anything I don't want to do. And everything is beautiful. So my recipe for happiness and for the dream life is this:

Find out what you like. Find out what you hate.

And then once you have this, then do as much as possible the things that you like and as little as possible the things that you hate, and then you're going to be very happy! OK. And once you reach a certain level, then there is some stuff you don't have to deal with.

I live in my bubble. Nobody's in a bubble with me like you know trying to mess things up and everything. It's absolutely awesome.
So here's the here's the kicker. The thing is once you once you live this life for a long period of time. So for me it's been five years there are certain things that you're not accustomed to anymore.

OK so we are under the impression that there are certain things in life that you have to put up with. You have to put up with this. You have to put up with that. And after you managed to build your dream life you realize that these people are wrong. You don't have to put up with that stuff!

The Dark Side Of The Dream Life.

So there are a lot of things that I completely erased from my life. OK. And this again is what you call the dream life but what happens now when you have to deal with people at some point because somehow you created a life that basically extracts you from society you know as a general sense of society. So you're not in there anymore.

You've created your own society with your own rules and have applied your own values and rules. And all of a sudden you have to deal with people who are still in in that other society. The other system OK. And this is why I'm telling you that there is a flip side of it. It’s something that I realized after listening to a podcast of someone I really admired.

This guy's a French guy. And we actually built kind of the same life. So same thing, the dude was traveling by himself. He has his own businesses and he works on those businesses alone. And he’s really like a low key type of guy who lives in a really quiet area. He is not a very outgoing person and stuff. So he will spend a lot of time by himself, just like me and working on and creating new stuff.

BUT….after being in your bubble for so long, it becomes really hard for you to interact with other people.

OK. And I never realized that! Normally when you're living this dream life you should be the happiest guy on the planet right? And you know when people see you, you should be like jumping around and smiling and acting like a clown and stuff like this. This is the image that you have when you say “Dude I'm going to be happy in my dream life”.

So yeah there is part of it where you're like super relaxed and super friendly and all that stuff but there is another part as well, where you have your own your own little world and you don’t have to put up with anybody's B.S. for so long that you're not used to it anymore. OK. And I realized that I became quite a bit more irritable than I was before.

So I don't have to deal with these kinds of people. And that means that my tolerance for them has gradually decreased over the last five years and now it's like zero tolerance for them in my life and in my environment. It doesn't mean that I hate people. People can do whatever they want. Just don't do it around me right?

So when you build this this life it becomes some sort safe of haven for you in a sense. You are in your own bubble, but it can become a PRISON as well if you're not careful! You're basically in a prison in that world that you've created, that's so perfect, that afterwards you will have a hard time dealing with people.

And I actually need to work on this because right now I realize that I have a hard time dealing with some people and it's really bad actually because once I identify that in a person I don't want to see that person anymore. I don't care.

And it happens that you know I'm around a group of people. If that person shows up, my mood will change even though I should just ignore that person, right? My mood will change and people will think that “dude you're irritable and you're moody and stuff”. I'm not moody. Just there is this one person that I absolutely don't want to be around you know. So again that's something I told you I need to work on, because it's bad! It’s affecting my social life.

But this is where it comes from. And this is something that you could actually encounter afterwards you know because again in your daily life, you have this this switch in your mind that says you have to put up with these kinds of people. But if you don't have that for you know two years or three years or five years, then you can end up in in that kind of situation where you will be socially awkward, when you should be the most sociable guy on the planet.

I'm actually very sociable right. So I'm saying that when you think about the dream life, you only think about the upside of it. You know the freedom all of this, all the joy and stuff and you don't realize the possible consequences of not being exposed to and knowing things for such a long time, that afterwards you have zero patience for it.

On Instagram I follow some accounts with quotes and stuff and there is always a quote that says “you know what? It's not that I'm a moody person, I just have zero tolerance for B.S.” or something like that. So when I read that, it's reassuring to know that I'm not the only one with this problem.

So yeah hopefully this was helpful.

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My name is Martin and I’m the creator of the MARTIN EBONGUE BLOG. Understanding how to create passive income, how to start businesses that run without me & how to make money online changed my existence. It allowed me to travel full-time, have ton of fun and live life on my own terms.
 

 

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