FBC – 384 – This is the fastest way to change your behaviour

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I wanted to tell you a story about my buddy Douglas.

So I already told you about Douglas, the character that I absolutely love in The IT crowd. He is the absolute best.

Now, the reason why I like Douglas is because the guy is so sexist that that kind of person doesn't exist. So that's the reason why I like Douglas, because the guy's an idiot. And to me, I mean, I feel like there is no Douglas on this planet.

And then I started thinking I was like, oh, but what if there was a character who was a super racist in a show? I'm pretty sure I wouldn’t have liked the guy.  So, you know, that got me thinking about things in other fields of life and stuff. But here watching a series, I just didn't take that into consideration.

There are things that people will go through that you don't go through. So it's very hard for you to relate to it. Which brings me to my point of today's episode.

You know, first of all, Douglas, is a really funny guy, depending on who you are, obviously. But here's the thing. One thing that I notice is that the easiest and the fastest way to change your perception or the glasses through which you see life is actually to step in someone else's shoes, OK.

Because it is very, very hard to change your life, right? So if you want to change your life, that's one thing, you want to change in your life. You have to change how you're thinking, OK, it starts there. It’s only the mind-set and stuff. So you have to change the way you think.

This is the fastest way to change your behaviour.

But here's the problem. Changing the way you think and rewiring your brain is hard and it takes a lot of time because it takes a lot of time to forget. You're like forty years of something that is engraved in your brain. It is hard for you to forget about it and go over it.

So if you're trying to change your perception or paradigm, just using the mind-set, stuff like the logic and stuff, it is going to be very hard and it's going to take a lot of time because there are things that you have to unlearn, things that hurt you really bad in the past and things that work for you, that you absolutely love.

There are things that you can do that will actually help you get there quicker. So I think I've already told you that the way you see life, it really depends on where you're sitting. Just imagine you're looking at a six and someone on the other side is seeing a nine.

You're both right. OK, it's just that you're sitting on different in different positions. And we covered this in a in a different podcast. There are as many variations of the world as there are people on this planet, because everyone has their own opinion, their own life and their own perception of the world.

So what I'm saying is that words are just not enough, experiences are a lot faster and a lot more powerful. Because again, there are things you cannot understand until you live them.

So there are some things. For example, I remember these documentaries that people were doing in France about racism because, you know, some people have never actually been the victim of racism. They just have the impression that it just doesn't exist. And it's just a method that was ages ago. And that, you know, people don't think this way anymore and that kind of stuff.

And, well, they it's not that they're lying to themselves that they've never experienced it.

So I remember some of these some of these shows where there were some like, you know, French people, Caucasians who basically had to spend a week with a disguise of a black person. So they had makeup and all that kind of stuff, and they had to leave this life for a week.

And these people who were at the beginning that I know there is nothing there and stuff. After a week, they realized that, dude, you know, it was a lot different from what they could see because the words were not enough. When people are saying this, they were like, yeah, doesn't exist, but they did experience it.

So some things they were made to experience were, you know, they were looking for like an apartment, and the landlord’s answer was always no. They couldn't go in the same nightclubs they've been going to for years and years. They were followed by security every time they went into a store, they tried job interviews as well.

They tried all these things that people were telling them, look, you know, you don't necessarily understand this because, you know, you don't go through this, but I go through that stuff. Right.

And finally they did understand. These people, they were crying like after half a day, if not even a few hours. I mean they were crying like, oh, man, what am I going to do?

And then you start realizing that some people actually have to go through this every single day and they have been for years. OK, so it's the same thing.

But anyway, put yourself voluntarily in the shoes of other people. OK, so for example, if you're well-off and everything, just try to put yourself in the shoes of someone who has a shoestring budget. And needs to build a business or something. Then you will intentionally go and limit your budget.

So that will help you be creative. That's one thing. It will help you be very, very creative, but also you will have a lot more respect for how some people are able to get by with a with a budget, you know.

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