How to stop putting yourself down.
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Are you trying to model after someone that you follow and you feel that there must be something wrong with you?
Why is it that they make it and, despite your best efforts, you can't seem to pull it off.
This kind of situation can be very frustrating and hurtful for many people
I recently helped a friend, who had been suffering from that same problem for many years, snap out of it.
There is one crucial concept you have to understand that will liberate you from this burden that you might be carrying today
All the details in today's episode
Here is one of my favorite quotes:
“Ideas are easy. Implementation is hard.”
– Guy Kawasaki, co-founder Alltop
Online Entrepreneur & free spirit:
Proud Owner Of The Martin Ebongue Blog
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Your Podcast Host
International Speaker | Podcaster | Free Spirit
Freedom Is A Choice: So choose wisely...
Welcome to the Freedom By Choice Podcast with your one and only hoste Martin. This podcast is reserved for freedom aficionados and entrepreneurs looking to create the lifestyle of their dreams.
In this podcast you will find all the support and answers you need to start, grow and scale a business that gives you the freedom you deserve.
I have compressed years of trials and errors, into easy to consume episodes, to take you from where you are now, to where you want to be.
I wanted to answer a few questions that I got from people, and I got these questions also from a very good friend of mine who is transitioning, actually, trying to figure out what the next move is and kind of like what to do. And he was asking me my opinion on the on the subject.
The thing is that, you know, sometimes you have a lack of role model that you're following. So let's say, for example, you're following this person and you like everything about them, right? You do. You like the way they see things and how their business operates and all that kind of stuff. And you want to be kind of like this person, you know? So it’s very easy to end up in this situation.
But one thing that I want you guys to understand, remember that I told you that in the previous podcast, you need to select your mentors carefully because you will inherit their beliefs and chain of thoughts and convictions and all that kind of stuff.
You know, if you're not careful, if you don't take the information for what it is and then afterwards make it your own, you can end up in a situation like this. But one thing that I didn't tell you before was that there is another thing that could actually happen to you and that could trigger a whole lot of the stress and confusion and frustration.
So when someone is your role model, there are different things that you like about them. Right? So there's the business that they have and what they do. But also the person, OK, because it is possible to find someone who is very successful, they have a good business but you don't like them because you just don't like the way they are.
But there is one thing that's actually very, very dangerous. And this is what I was trying to explain in previous episodes, I explained the difference between creators and performers.
When you start following someone and idolizing that person, you want to be like that person, forgetting to take into account the fact that maybe you are not a creator. So let's say, for example, you you're a big fan of, I don't know, Bill Gates or something like that.
But you in your core, you're more of a performer. And you will go through a very, very long frustration period where you'll basically tell yourself that you suck.
Why can’t I do this? Bill Gates did it and why can't I? It's just because you're not cut from the same cloth. You're more of a performer and not necessarily a creator, which again, there's nothing bad about being a performer and nothing bad about being a creator. It's just two different things. They're equally as valuable to the success of a company.
And if you don't recognize this, then you will feel bad. So my other friend, she was feeling really, really bad about this because, there was someone that she admires. She wants to model after that person. But she was like, dude, I don't know why I can't. I try and, you know, what's wrong with me?
How to stop putting yourself down
And I was like, look, here's the thing. Here's the distinction. You do have the same values as that person so you can replicate those and you can, like, emulate that. But you have forgotten about this this whole other aspect where maybe that person's a creator and you're not or maybe that person is a performer and you're not a performer.
She was miserable because of this, you know, asking herself what's wrong with me and stuff, there's nothing wrong with you.
OK, so if there is some people like this that you admire, some people in your family, you see them do this and you're like, oh, why can't I?. Then the point here is to recognize, just look at your whole life. If you look at your whole life, you'll be able to know if you're a performer, if you're a creator.